Finding success at fantasy a fantasy
By Chris Taylor, managing editor

     Football has started, the temperature has dropped to the low 100’s, and I am hooked on fantasy football, having recently joined the free Southern football league.
     First I had to select a league. The next step was to draft players. I allowed for an auto-draft, so a computer drafted the team for me. The next day I got my first look at my players. Ugh.
     To give you an idea how this league works, you pick actual NFL players. Then you receive a certain number of points. Rushing yards, touchdowns scored and receiving yards add to the amount of points your player receives. You total all your players’ points, and the team with the most points wins.
     Defense is different in this league. You pick an entire team’s defense.
After seeing my team, I was discouraged. But, thanks to Duce Staley’s big day against the Cowboys, I realized I had a pretty good team, and I beat the team I was playing against.
     Even better, my team piled up 99 points. I almost had sole possession of first, but I found myself sharing.
     My nemesis is a team named the Birmingham Billy Bobs, and apparently they are scared to death of my team.
     Another fun aspect of this game is getting players off waivers and making trades. I picked tight ends Kyle Brady of the Jaguars and Jackie Harris of the Cowboys and receiver Torry Holt of the Rams. My enemy, whom I play this week, also started beefing up his team.
     The paranoia in me said he was attempting to out maneuver me. I was right.
     I now have found a person willing to trade, a.k.a a sucker. I propose a trade for the Bronco’s defense, Keyshawn Johnson and Peyton Manning, in exchange for my team’s Giant’s defense and Torry Holt and Vinny Testaverde.
     In order to trade, five teams cannot object to the trade. I engineered this awesome and even trade and guess what happened?
     I get one objection, then two and then three. I sense the Machiavellian machinations of the Billy Bobs behind this. It may be a conspiracy. Maybe the owner was on the grassy knoll.
     I think he’s running scared now. I hope to crush him like a bug, and all this for a prize that really isn’t that good.