Hunk chump for forming teamwork
by Michael Kraft, entertainment editor

    “One for all and all for one.”

    That’s the motto of the Musketeers, the elite swordsmen loyal to the king of France in Alexandre Dumas’ novel, The Three Musketeers.

    But like the singular title of the new movie, The Musketeer, the motto seems to be “all for one and all for one.”

    The Musketeer is another in a line of films based on Dumas’ novel, but the filmmakers probably interpreted based on as “Let’s just take the characters’ names, destroy their personalities and focus the movie on a glass of water of a leading hunk.”

    Don’t misunderstand. The movie is okay as entertainment, but to fans of the novel, it will be sacrilege.

    The film opens with a young D’Artagnan forced to watch the evil Febre (played with perfection by Tim Roth) murder his parents. He vows to grow up, learn to fight and kill Febre. Fourteen years later, he travels to Paris with his teacher, Bonacieux, to find Febre and avenge his parents’ murders.

    He encounters the Musketeers, now disbanded after some frame-ups and bad publicity arranged to discredit them.

    D’Artagnan discovers a plot by Cardinal Richelieu to undermine King Louis XIII, start a war with Spain and England and take over control of France.

    Richelieu’s insane lieutenant is, of course, Febre, and soon D’Artagnan sees his dual mission: avenge his parents and stop the evil plans. An okay plot—but things get in the way of making it really good.

    For the most part, the other musketeers are relegated to back-marker status. Porthos is generally useless; Aramis looks like he is trying to be Mandy Patinkin in the Princess Bride, and Athos has less than 10 lines, most of which are said while drunk. The movie centers on D’Artagnan, but to take the other musketeers and almost write them out is silly.

    Another ridiculous change is D’Artagnan’s motivation in the film.
    In the movie, he goes to Paris because of revenge and uses the musketeers as a means to an end.

    Even when he must muster up a force to attack Febre’s headquarters, one feels that he is using the other musketeers rather than joining them.

    That brings up the fight sequences. I admit to being a sucker for swashbuckling movies and love a good swordfight, but one huge problem in The Musketeer is I couldn’t see the fights.

    Director and cinematographer Peter Hyams has made a name for himself with his dark, moody lighting and close, concealing shots.
This is perfect camera work for intimate moments or tense dialogue, but terrible for sweeping, broad fights.

    The fights themselves can’t escape criticism either.

    Billed as “stunning fight choreography by legendary Hong Kong fight choreographer Xin Xin Xiong,” the fights were impressive, but seemed out of place and were hampered by the poor camera work.
    I admit my other big weakness is Kung-Fu movies, but there is something wrong with a French swordsman leaping around and balancing on ladders like Jackie Chan. If I wanted Rumble in the Bronx, I would have rented it.

    The characters are all rather thin and the performances could have been mailed in.

    Mena Suvari’s role as Franchesca, the love interest, was very empty, and she had no romantic chemistry with D’Artagnan. Stephen Rea was wasted as Richelieu as was Catherine Deneuve playing the Queen.

    In fairness though, she did inject some spunk into a cardboard character.

    Roth’s performance as the evil Febre was excellent and just confirms that he is a true villain actor. His good guys are okay, but he really shines as a sword-wielding heavy here, much like his bad guy in Rob Roy.

    Leading man, Justin Chambers, used to be a male model and seems to rely on his jutting chin and dark eyes to carry the character instead of actual acting ability.

    This film could have been much better if D’Artagnan weren’t so horribly miscast in an obvious attempt to fill seats based on the Chambers’ pretty-boy quotient.

    In the end, this film could have been much better if it stuck to the original novel more, had better supporting character development, better camera work and lighting and had been used less as a backdrop for fights and stunts and more as a human story.

    Even people who like swashbuckling and/or Kung-Fu should be wary. While fine if kept separate, combining the two is dangerous, much like combining drinking and driving.

    And like drinking and driving, the result here is a bad accident.